16 Comments

  1. Jordan L. Hawk
    February 4, 2013 @ 10:35 am

    Keep in mind all these things are “setbacks” not “failures.” Temporary, not permanent. 🙂

    If I may recommend a book to you: “The Power of Less” by Leo Babuata. http://www.amazon.com/The-Power-Less-Essential-ebook/dp/B001ODEPLM/ I recommend it to anyone who is feeling overwhelmed.

    Reply

    • alicamckennajohnson
      February 6, 2013 @ 8:44 pm

      I will check it out, thanks Jordan! And yes setbacks, I’m doing better so far my 1 hour work/home/writing thing is working but I will definitely check out the book.

      Reply

  2. charismaloy
    February 4, 2013 @ 10:52 am

    I had too many balls in the air, too. For far too long. I did the “go to college and get a real job” route, but my family never let up. They kept throwing more balls into my mix. To bad I never learned to let the new ones fall before I ever touched them. In the end, I couldn’t have qualified for Circle K. I might have survived shoveling road crew for the highway department, but that would have been a stretch. Then I remembered a scene from one of those “move into this mansion and figure out your emotional hangups so you can lose weight and be a happier person” makeover shows. The gist of it was that as long as we hold onto all that crap, it ties itself into macrame and stops us in our tracks. There is no forward movement.

    I chose to drop it all. I warned those that I could that they would have to carry their own weight, and walked away. Literally. I packed two suitcases, a back pack, my laptop, and my cat, and walked away. Out of the house, out of town, out of the state, out of the country. I made myself unreachable so that I could figure out which of those many balls I CHOOSE to carry. I have picked up a few new ones… kind of like Koosh balls, they are easy to juggle because they want to be caught. I have picked up one of the old balls so far and am starting to get my rhythm back.

    I had certain advantages in that I don’t have a spouse and children to worry about. The thing is, there are balls that you CAN drop, just until you find your rhythm again. Be choosy, and if we don’t see you for a little bit, that’s okay. We know you’ll be back. If nothing else for the cute guys in kilts.

    Reply

    • alicamckennajohnson
      February 6, 2013 @ 8:46 pm

      I love that you have been able to let go and figure out what is really important to you. I need to sit down and do this within my life and see what things I can release.

      shoveling does sound rather therapeutic, maybe I’ll go for that instead of circle K 🙂

      Reply

  3. prudencemacleod
    February 4, 2013 @ 11:27 am

    Hey Alica, we’ve all been in that head space from time to time. I admit I’ve been there all too often lately. I just want you to remember this, we’ve all read your stuff and can testify that you’re not a failure.
    Your writing is great and we want more. Forget the dang contests and get another installment of Phoenix Child published. (Okay, so I’m a fan.) Woman, anyone who can balance a family, a home, jobs and a career is a long way from failure.

    You will need to rant from time to time, though, so if you need someone to rant to, I’m always here.

    Hoping you’re feeling better, Pru

    Reply

    • alicamckennajohnson
      February 6, 2013 @ 8:51 pm

      Thanks so much Pru! I’m glad to know I’m not alone in my crazy 🙂 I’m in the middle of revising Phoenix child and then onto fourth round edits of Legancy of the Feathered Serpent, hopefully with only a few more melt downs in-between.

      Reply

  4. Gilliad Stern
    February 4, 2013 @ 1:54 pm

    This is defintely one of the key places in my own life that I need to get better at. Running an distributor as the manager and the only salesman and having a newer daughter at home sure pulls me in a lot of directions. Trying to find time for writing can be hard at times. I like the way you are dispersing your time into the evenings. I might have to look at doing some of the same.

    Hope things are coming together for you though!

    Reply

    • alicamckennajohnson
      February 6, 2013 @ 8:52 pm

      Thanks so far the one hour things is working for me. I hope I can keep it up, for me it’s all about forcing the routine.

      Reply

  5. marlenedotterer
    February 4, 2013 @ 11:09 pm

    It’s never easy to figure these things out. I think women feel too darn responsible for everything around them. We always want to step up and take care of it.

    Then we end up like you just did – completely freaked out. I’m older and wiser (ha!) than you, and I can only tell you it’s always like this. All my kids are grown, so now I worry about the grandkids, Who am I kidding? I still worry about the KIDS! And I go crazy trying to figure out how to do things for all of them.

    I agree about the contests. You’ve got a book out there and the most important thing you can do about it, is get the next book out. Contests, queries, conferences… they are all great if you have time. But when your life resembles a kaleidoscope, you have to put the extras aside. Wait for those occasions when things are slower to deal with them.

    I hope you can come up for air once in a while. Good luck as you go through all this!

    Reply

    • alicamckennajohnson
      February 6, 2013 @ 8:56 pm

      Thank you, and yes I agree it can be very very difficult to make sure I find time for myself. I am grateful for how supportive hubby is, and so far my hour per thing is working well. I just need to keep it going!

      Reply

  6. Diana Beebe
    February 5, 2013 @ 1:56 pm

    Hang in there! It’s smart to think of the day in chunks and devote hours where you need them most–I’m glad those thoughts came to you. I just posted about time and wanting more, so I really enjoyed your post. {{Hugs}}

    Reply

    • alicamckennajohnson
      February 6, 2013 @ 9:01 pm

      Thanks Diana- I kept running around like a chicken with its head off because I kept thinking of everything I needed to get done. Now that I’m doing an hour, and stopping at an hour, is really helping me stay focused.

      Reply

  7. Brandy
    February 5, 2013 @ 2:56 pm

    For the cleaning thing I really strongly suggest you visit unfuckyourhabitat.tumblr.com. The profanity is just one of the reasons why I love it.

    Reply

  8. amylynnbright
    February 7, 2013 @ 8:12 pm

    Don’t think you’re all alone in this. It’s so hard not to give up. I’ve essentially given up sleep and spend nine wasted hours a day despising my necessary day job. Remember to breathe and it will get better. Try not to be so hard on yourself.

    Reply

    • alicamckennajohnson
      February 9, 2013 @ 10:49 am

      *hugs* breathing is important, and the whole hour a day of foucs is really helping. Thankfully in my day job I can multitask 🙂

      Reply

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