Photo by Joanne Salge Lee

Photo by Joanne Salge Lee

So I REALLY like Burt’s Bees lip balms. Like, I really like them. I think I have more than a dozen of them, in all different flavors. I have two next to next to my bed, four clear ones and three tinted ones in my purse, one by the TV, two or three in my backpack, and several more in coat pockets, the car, and other unexpected places.
Hubby sometimes tries to save money by buying me other brands.
Hubby: It has the same ingredients as Burt’s Bees, but it’s cheaper.
Me, giving the small non-yellow tube the stink eye: It smells nice, thanks.
Hubby sighing: Why don’t you try it?
Me: Rubs non-Burt’s Bees lip balm on my lips, which have started twitching in an effort to get away from the imposter.
Hubby: Alica, really. It’s just wax and scent.
Me: You don’t understand. This feels like betrayal—like cheap street corner hooker betrayal.
Hubby, rolling his eyes: Maybe one of the kids will want it.
And the little thieves will take the fake lip balm in order to psych me out. But then when I go looking for a lip balm, it’ll be gone. One of the horrid urchins has stolen MY Burt’s Bees lip balm, and I yet again wonder why I ever wanted children in the first place.
So at this point I’ve started buying the kids their own, so they leave mine alone AND I always have a secret stash of Burt’s Bees just in case of theft.
Do you have a favorite lip balm??